GO!

To God from the Dog...

This is the place to let your fur down! This forum is for games, sharing fun stories, and just having a good time with your fellow Dogsters!

  
Ozzy

Love me!
 
 
Barked: Mon Feb 2, '09 9:22pm PST 
TO GOD FROM THE DOG...

Dear God:
Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be
a good dog (you know I have been guilty of these before):


1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

3. I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box; although they are tasty, they are not food.

4. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.

5. The sofa is not a face towel; neither are Mom and Dad's laps.

6. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

8. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration.

9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.

10. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is not an acceptable way of saying 'hello.'

11. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.

12. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house.

13. I will not throw up in the car.

14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

15. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch when company is over.

16. The cat is not a squeaky toy; so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

And God I was wondering about some other things:

Dear God:
Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

Dear God:
When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch ... or is it going to be the same old story?

Dear God:
Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?

Dear God:
When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?

Dear God:
If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

Dear God:
We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God:
More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God:
When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to shake hands to get in?

Dear God:
Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?
[notify]
Maddi

FAST DAWG!
 
 
Barked: Tue Feb 3, '09 4:23am PST 
Awesome, dude! laugh out loudlaugh out loudlaugh out loudlaugh out loudlaugh out loudlaugh out loudlaugh out loudlaugh out loud
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JerryLee

Lord of the- manor,master of- the woods.
 
 
Barked: Tue Feb 3, '09 7:01am PST 
applause Amen applause
[notify]

Rikee (2002 - 2013)

Rikee - I'm a lover
 
 
Barked: Sun Mar 22, '09 7:24pm PST 
laugh out loudlaugh out loud Tooooooo funny
[notify]
Abby CGC

Big and- Beautiful
 
 
Barked: Mon Mar 23, '09 12:50pm PST 
oh that is the best!!! applause
[notify]
Bailey

462570
 
 
Barked: Mon May 11, '09 8:15am PST 
Bol that's cute! blue dog
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Rosie

Is your breed- next? Ban BSL.
 
 
Barked: Mon May 11, '09 2:32pm PST 
BOL! laugh out loud
The cat is not a squeaky toy; so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.
That was was meant for me! Sometimes I forget though!
Much Love ~ Rosie
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