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Kinda need some advice ( dad in laws dog)

Got a new, young, furry love in your life? This is the place for you to ask all of your questions-big or small! Just remember that you are receiving advice from other dog owners and lovers... not professionals. If you have a major problem, always seek the advice of a vet or behaviorist! Most important is to remember to have fun with your new fur baby.

  
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Tiller- (Skansen's- Ira in the M

I DO Exist...To- Drive You Batty
 
 
Barked: Mon Jan 21, '13 8:38pm PST 
I agree with Charlie that the OP has made up their mind and was hoping for affirmation, but they need to see what IS. Certainly as a dog lover, one can understand the huge importance of this. And as a human being....well it's not always easy, but sometimes in life we just need to suck it up.

I foster. A lot. Displaced dogs from bad backgrounds. I have never seen, or considered, that a foster would rub off on my own dogs. If there are concerns, the dogs can be kept separated. I agree that it seems unlikely any sort of consistent protocol has been given a chance, so the dog is being sold short. Certainly under more attentive management, he will get better. Barking can be controlled or lessened.

Too much? Contact resources for someone else to house the dog while FIL gets his feet back under him. Make it happen.

This is about humanity. This man has been through a lot and obviously for all the animals he gave away, this one is very important to him. As he is part of your family, you need to do something. As a dog lover, you ought to do something.
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Sabi

When the night- closes in I will- be there
 
 
Barked: Mon Jan 21, '13 10:24pm PST 
Guest is right, an ESA does not count as a pet. I checked in your area.

But I think Charlie hit it, your decision is made.
Barking is a solvable issue, be proactive. Talk to your neighbors, explain that you are moving an elder, ill relative and his pooch in for a while and the dog has some issues that you will be working on.
If the dogs are not ok together invest in some baby gates, put a TV in FILs room so him and his pup can chill together, take her for lots of walks and invest in some entertaining toys. Try teaching her some simple tricks, if she is in fact part poodle there is zero chance she won't learn.
I live in a 900 sq ft house, I have 3-7 GSDs of varying ages and backgrounds in my home at any given time. I don't worry about what might happen I just make it work. If conflicts arise I rotate dogs, so they all get some time with me.
Your lab is an ESA, and that is essentially what your FILs girl is doing for him. Would you be ok if someone made you give up your dog?
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Jackson Tan

Lad about town
 
 
Barked: Tue Jan 22, '13 2:03am PST 
All I can say is if my FIL needed a place to go and wanted to bring his cat which I hate, which is loud and destructive and has attacked me, which hates my dog and peed all over my bed, I'd still have to say yes. Because all I can think of of what it would be like to lose my pet in such a situation and the thought is unbearable. I would have to suck it up. I couldn't do say no.
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Titan

Late Christmas- Baby
 
 
Barked: Tue Jan 22, '13 7:21am PST 
Okay this is done.... compeltely done and not I'm listing reasons this has turned into a guilt trip thing and all I wanted was advice so here comes a list.

1.The "i've been homeless before thing" I HAVE BEEN HOMELESS. I used all my options up and still had to rehome my pup (not this one for folks who are going to go "OMG SHE GAVE HER DOG AWAY" when he got sick and again no body could or would help. So to say that I should make him live in the street because I CAN'T let his dog live in my 700 sq foot apt is wrong. I get that he is going through alot but somethings you CANT do. 4 people and 4 pets are too much. Someone has to draw a line in the sand somewhere.

2. I'm 5 months pregnant. We are bout to have 4 people living in in my apt. ( me , baby , hubby and FIL.) we simply don't have the room and again FIL is too sick to ever move out. All I wanted was some resources or something to help. I never said that I wanted him to give her away I was asking for ways to get help and even tho some of you ( or all of you in this matter) have been snarky, judgmental and rude beyond repair I got it so thank you even if it was condescending. Really enjoyed that. Oh Ie the "bark collar" and stuff they tried that for YEARS and guess what she still barks for hrs on end.


3. Just because you "CAN" have something or do something doesn't mean you should. Just because legally I CAN have more than 3 doesn't mean I should have more than 3 pets ( or animals period) living in my apt. The barking isn't a matter of neighbors its Management.Its in my lease that if she barks ( for hrs like I've said) we can be fined and asked to remove her.( like I've said) Oh and baby gates with my lab don't work he jumps right over them. so the separating them if they don't get along won't work with nothing short of a door being closed at all times and I won't do that to any dog even one that will bark at everything is old.

I won't be commenting on this anymore. I don't like being ganged up on but for a min try to see this from the OP's point of view. You all keep telling to see it from his and I do but I'm having to make a tough choice to either let him bring her here or not. I get that she is helping him I understand that much I do but what am I suppose to do if I do let her back in and they ( management) says to get rid of her for the barking? then we are back here at square 1. with FIL needing a place to stay but nowhere to put the dog. I'm going to contact rescues and the humane society again ( he has been on a list for his rabbits forever) to see if they can help till we find a bigger place. ( going to need it anyway since I'm PREGNANT) but I don't think they will board a dog for long periods of time. Anyway thanks for the sugguestions No thanks for the judgemental Imahorridpersonforhavingalimmitandlookingatthebigpicture attitude It wasn't needed.
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Tyler

Whippy- The- Whipador
 
 
Barked: Tue Jan 22, '13 7:27am PST 
I actually thought all the posts were very reasonable. I did suggest an idea of what you should do if you don't/can't take the dog and that should be looking for advice on what options are available to your FIL and then present him with those options.
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Shiver Me- Timbers- "Charlie"

My Little Dog, a- heartbeat at my- feet.<3
 
 
Barked: Tue Jan 22, '13 8:22am PST 
Thing is, OP... everyone WAS being reasonable and giving RESOURCES and OPTIONS.. And trying to get you to view things from another perspective. But time and time again, you've continually pointed out why you CAN'T do ANY of that, and time and time again, you've made excuses.

I'm sorry, but pregnancy... You're using that as a reason too?

Guess what? I'm pregnant too. And if my fiance's parents needed somewhere to stay with BOTH their dogs, they'd come here and I certainly don't have the room either, but I'd make it work. And yeah, management can fine me too. wink

And if my mothers side needed that kind of help? With their 180 lb Rottweiler who doesn't get along with Charlie.. I'd STILL do it in a heartbeat. Doing a rotation and keeping it fair for both dogs IS NOT hard. I've done it with five dogs that didn't get along.

Again, as I said previously - if you REFUSE to try to help him with this in any way or look at potential resources, then perhaps you should sit him down, TELL HIM AS MUCH, and he'll do whatever he does from there. Because when it comes down to it, it's his choice on whether or not he gets rid of his dog to go live with you or tries to find elsewhere to go.

Perhaps I am judgmental. But I find it CRUEL to do that. And if you really think he'll be with you guys forever from here on out and that it won't be short term - WHY would you be looking into temporary homes for the dog anyway? To lie to him about whether or not he could ever get his dog back would be even nastier than being straight up.
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Member Since
06/03/2011
 
 
Barked: Tue Jan 22, '13 9:50am PST 
last post.

I'm sorry, but pregnancy... You're using that as a reason too?

Guess what? I'm pregnant too. And if my fiance's parents needed somewhere to stay with BOTH their dogs, they'd come here and I certainly don't have the room either, but I'd make it work. And yeah, management can fine me too. wink


then you already know each and every pregnancy is different and I'm not laying out every health issue I'm going through ( which are painful and not of the mental health kind and yeah I had em before I got pregnant.) out on dogster to satisfy you sorry not going to happen and if you want to get fined for taking in a dog that you know has issues fine by me not my house not my limits not my rules. But a two bedroom small apt that we are having to fit 3 people ( when one is born) into a single bedroom is hard enough along with the 3 animals we already have. just to make room for him to stay. And I've said repeatedly this isn't short term. I'm not being mean I'm being realistic. Sorry if that makes some of you upset but not everyone can do what the rotating stuff ect. we simply don't have the room. I'm also not saying that he has to give her up. She ( his dog) needs a place to stay till we can either take care of the barking OR if he chooses to find her a new home AND what you are calling excuses I'm calling reasons because your not living in my situation your not living in my skin or in my life at all so what seems like excuses to you may not be as it appears. Again you guys need to try to look at it from My point of view too.


as for the Humane Society and rescues I'm looking into someone who has the know how and the patience to work with her ( his dog folks) I'm not saying she can never come stay here. I'm saying that till the barking is taken care of she can't. Some of you may have the money for the fines but I know I don't. Again being realistic not being mean. I'm done talking bout this. He is one a waiting list from the humane society to see what can be done as far as the barking goes. I'm standing firm ( and hubby understands this as it would be HIM paying the fines and dues right now if we did get those) that till she stops barking for 2 , 3 ,4 hrs on end she cannot stay here. And before anyone goes off on the fact I said we might get a bigger place. We'd have to break a lease to do that. Meaning more money out the door so that may not happen for a good 4 to 6 months after my child is born. I'm done talking bout this. As far as I know I'm probably not comming back to dogster at all.
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Tyler

Whippy- The- Whipador
 
 
Barked: Tue Jan 22, '13 11:18am PST 
I'm sorry you've taken offence to the posts Titan and that you felt the need to delete your account...

I hope your FIL finds the help he needs regardless of the decision he ultimately makes.
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Titus

Cave canis- vigilo omnis
 
 
Barked: Tue Jan 22, '13 11:33am PST 
You might try a training facility - there are a number of places here who will help people in transition by providing free/low cost boarding for their dogs for extended periods of time. If you anticipate moving to a larger place in the not-too-distant future and can reclaim the dog then, that might be an option.
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Member Since
12/31/1969
 
 
Barked: Tue Jan 22, '13 2:54pm PST 
um, you said: "thing is guys we are only allowed 3 animals in our apt complex"

and then I say that an ESA isn't a pet,

and then you say: "Just because legally I CAN have more than 3 doesn't mean I should have more than 3 pets"..

are you looking for advice or just want people to agree with you????? wait, feel free not to answer that.
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