Barked: Wed Jan 16, '13 9:56am PST |
 |  |  |  | Angel, you took the words out of my mouth. It isn't about keeping your dog in a bubble. My dog goes everywhere that he can handle. Friend's house for playdates, pet supply store, to visit family, beach including off leash at fiesta island, training class, etc, etc. I don't interfere unless I see a reason to. If he's playing with another dog and there is occasional growling or yelping which causes the other dog to immediately back off, great. I actually feel better about two dogs playing when I see a little problem arise and they handle it well, because it shows me that they can communicate with each other. On the other hand, sometimes I see Smokey get overwhelmed. If he starts circling and barking, he needs a break because he is feeling threatened by the other dog. Some days it happens a lot, some days not at all. Sometimes I just sit there watching for a couple of hours, because the dogs are playing so beautifully. When I do intervene, it doesn't mean that I screech about protecting my widdle baby from the scary monster and run for the hills; I just pick him up and hold him for a couple of minutes until he is calm. (I conditioned him to like being held because it's so convenient when we're away from home, but a timeout in a crate works too). Most of the time he's back to playing in a couple minutes. This is not just out of concern for him, but also to encourage the behaviors I want. Automatically focusing on me when he's uncomfortable, for example, helps when he is thinking about growling and lunging at a bike or barking at noises. IMO, you want a balance between independence and deference. You want your dog to be able to handle himself to a point, but when he's uncomfortable and not being heard, there are only two options- your dog looks to you to protect him, or he protects himself however he sees fit. The point at which you need to interfere is probably different for different dogs, and more dependent on how your dog feels about what is happening rather than the actual event. But imo, a snarl or an air snap, especially if not between established playmates who listen to each other well, is the clearest of signals that intervention should happen immediately if it hasn't already. Though he MAY stop short of biting a puppy, or at least not do major damage, if you ignore the last clear warnings that come before a bite, you take that risk. Dogs live by conditioned association. I don't want mine learning that snapping and snarling aren't enough to stop other dogs from doing things he doesn't like. I think of it as him doing me a favor by giving notice that he isn't happy about what's going on. I want to encourage him to keep doing that by listening to him. If your kid cries because someone teases him or hits him and you say "man up, pansy" or "work it out between yourselves," he is going to turn into a person who doesn't express his feelings. Why should he, when nothing good comes of it? My experience has been that listening to Smokey makes him braver and more confident rather than making him overly dependent on me. You don't get a bombproof dog by throwing it terrified into the ring with snarling beasts- you get a reactive dog that way. You get a bombproof dog by teaching him that when he says uncle, you're going to get him out of there. The more he trusts you to protect him, the more he's able to tolerate. I've had Smokey a few months, and he's already more comfortable with rough play and big dogs than he was before, and better at looking at me rather than doing something antisocial (although that's definitely a work in progress, since he had three years of practice with defending himself). |  |  |  |  |
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